Denial…"I'm not that out of shape!"

One of the most common themes I've struggled with in my own life is the "I'm not really that out of shape!"  Yet I've taken the same 25 pounds off and on again for the past two decades…over and over and over again.  First, the clothes start to get a little tight, but I tell myself "I'm not really that out of shape".  Feeling sluggish by 3pm becomes a daily occurrence and I add more caffeine and tell myself again "I'm not really that out of shape". The stairs seem to make me more 'winded' each time I have to track laundry up and down but you know what? You get it!  So the imprints of these things start to affect me in a way that I start thinking I better do SOMETHING. So I get motivated. I decide on what  plan of attack I'll take. I get to the gym, take a walk, eat better…do well, shed some pounds and start to feel BETTER!
                  But then something happens.  I get busy, stressed, start feeling selfish for taking 'ME time' away from my family and business and slowly slip into those old habits and the pounds come back again.

One of the ways we can combat this is to ask for support/mentorship. This past year my weight loss goals have been met and with relative consistency because of the help of a trainer and wellness coach. I've found that when I have more  'skin in the game' I am more committed and I'm seeing longer term results and developing a healthy pattern of new behaviors.

                  The same is true of developing a healthy plan for your finances.

Many of us, me included, hit periods where we start 'the plan'  to spend less and save more.  Commit ourselves to stop charging and start paying back on things we splurged on month's ago.  How many of you are still trying to pay for Christmas '2014 or summer vacation from LAST year?  How many of you are still paying for your college education and yet haven't seen the inside of a dorm room in nearly a decade? We get 'on track' but then something happens.  Not the normal 'Oh no, Alex's cleats don't fit anymore and tryouts are next week!!!" OR "he's turning 16 in two weeks and the driver training enrollment needs to be in NOW?!" type stuff. It's more like this:  "I've cooked three nights in a row and no one wants the leftovers the heck with it, let's go out!" OR "I can't believe it, I FINALLY got a 30% off code at Kohl's!"  and….. WE GIVE IN.  WE GET "OFF TRACK".  We think, just like other struggle areas that "we are really not THAT bad'.   But our perception is tainted. We look around and try to justify that 'everyone' does it. We tell ourselves that our kids need to have a better education than we did no matter what the cost. Our student loan feels like a family pet. We end up working harder &  longer, and many times in jobs that are unfulfilling and even stop believing that the life we dream about is even possible any longer.

   How would using a financial coach benefit you in the way a wellness coach benefited me?

• Do you need help navigating through a financial crisis?  
• Building a workable budget? And having an accountability partner as you learn your way?
• Need help eliminating your debt once and for all? 
• Learn how to deal with collectors? 
• Establish a plan for retirement and college?

These are all areas of support where real guidance could make huge difference in the long term quality of your life!

WANT TO RAISE FINANCIALLY HEALTHY KIDS? GIVE UP IGNORANCE AND KEEPING UP WITH THE JONES'S...

• Living in a bigger house
• Driving more expensive cars
• Wearing designer clothing 
• Birthday party for Billy and his 15 friends 

All of these are great to have but I'm an advocate for having what you need before having what you want. I teach my clients the tools of building and protecting the '4 walls' (food - shelter- transportation- clothing) and building a solid foundation BEFORE you put the roof on.

Many families today "feel" (yes emotion drives 80% of our money handling) as though their children will suffer if they don't have the newest bat, the UGG boots, and the party for 15 at Chucky Cheese. I truly believe this started with our 80's generation because I don't remember my parents being focused on making sure I had $100 pairs of NIKE's, and a birthday party that cost as much as a monthly car payment. They knew better.  Sure, they had there set of 'keeping up with the Jones's too' but the credit frenzy was just beginning when I was a teenager. We had the Sears and JCPenney cards (didn't everyone?) but I didn't watch my parents charge the washer/dryer on 90 days same as cash. They didn't finance our childhood pet. They did what most American's did before credit became a 'normal way of life" they paid CASH and only when they could afford it. 

So how is this new credit action affecting our children? Really think about the long term effects our buying decisions and behaviors have on our kids. If you are using credit cards to get your nails done, take the family vacation, and stopping at Panera, Papa Gino's, and Outback for dinner this week, these are the behavior patterns our kids see AND become accustomed to.  They don't SEE cash leave your hands. They don't SEE half of the weekly paycheck going out the door for the family cell phone plan with unlimited minutes, texts, and data. They don't SEE the cable bill came in $70 higher because it snowed for three days and school was canceled, and the added cost of 'hitting the rent movie button' actually takes away from the normal budget.  Unless you are talking to them about what it takes to run a household and modeling the things you know will create healthy adults down the road, you are missing out on an opportunity to teach your children what Mastercard & Discover will teach them if you don't. Start using an 'envelope system". I'm a huge fan of what this one tool provided in terms of my kids SEEING a change in my behavior. When we stopped for a bite to eat at a drive thru for example I had my son pull out the envelope and the unfamilar cash to pay for the order. Same at the grocery store, if they are with me, they open up the envelope and can see the $$ leaving .. they also are quick to count what's left and tell me 'that's it? we better be careful!"  I'm proud of this because I know there is a huge difference in their awareness (not just mine) that has benefited them with my changing my pattern from ignorance to understanding. 

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